I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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