that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
