Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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