She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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