Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
