Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
