No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
