we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
