I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Congratulations! We have a period
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
