he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize