im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
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Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
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I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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