I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
