Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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