K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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