just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
