god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
