I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You know, be my cock's hype man.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Randomize
