dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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