there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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