The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Randomize
