why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
