Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
