Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
