i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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