only you would photoshop your dick
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
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I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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