You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
