I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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