That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
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If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
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I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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