When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I see more hoeing in ur future
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