you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
