i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
