Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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