He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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