check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
