I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
