Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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