This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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