u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
