Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Randomize
