and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
