I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize