can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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