White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I am mentally ready for anal.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
