i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
He told me they were just razor bumps!
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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