Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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