I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.