I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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