I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
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Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
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I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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