She's JV to your varsity
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.