That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Randomize
