Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
