And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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